All summer I had nightmares
Of certain impending doom.
Just thinking of the horrors
That await me in that room.

This year I took Karate
And some Yubiwazu too,
And to be on the safe side
Took Kendo and Jujitsu.

I can break a two-by-four
Using just my empty hand,
And using just my pinky
I can crush a soft drink can.

I can stun a charging bull
And break concrete with my foot.
Then with just my hardened fists
Can crush coal chunks into soot.

But it still terrifies me,
Fills my thoughts with dread and doom.
Is that training going to help,
When I enter my classroom?

I took out life insurance
For a million bucks so far.
That they would insure teachers
Shows how out of touch they are!