Category: Growing Older

“The secret of long life,” Gramps said, “A pinch of gunpowder at every meal. It will keep your body healthy And aches and pains will quickly heal.” It must have worked for Grandpa, He lived to be a hundred and three. He’s best remembered for the crater Where the crematorium used to be.

Although ninety years old, Jack played golf every day, So he was unhappy, His sight was slipping away. He could still hit the ball A good country mile, But not seeing its flight Was cramping his style. His wife said, “Take Herby, He has perfect eyesight. He’s a hundred and two But he’s still very […]

My wife’s getting hard of hearing, I really have to let her know. When you are getting old, like her, Your hearing’s often first to go. She also mumbles when she talks Just like that deaf girl on TV. But when I try to let her know, She says the one that’s deaf is me. […]

This morning the toilet stopped up, I hurriedly plunged out the clogs. My wife called out from the kitchen, “It’s going to rain cats and dogs!” So I got out my umbrella, Put the plunger under the sink. I had no time for my breakfast And I didn’t take time to think. While waiting down […]

He said he found a memory book And that his memory had improved. No longer would he forget a name, All fear of embarrassment removed. The book taught him to associate New names and places with things he knows. Like somebody with a name like Storm, He associates with one who blows. So I asked […]